Three decades ago, Terry Waite’s Christmas meal consisted of a boiled egg and a cold tomato.

During his 1,763 days in captivity, special occasions passed without recognition as he sat alone on a tiled floor, shackled to a radiator.

Terry’s five-year ordeal at the hands of militants in Lebanon continues to shape his life 28 years after his release.

Now aged 80, he spends Christmas morning with the homeless in London before heading back to enjoy a traditional meal that his incarceration denied him for so long.

Recalling December 25 at the hands of his captors – associates of the militant group Hezbollah – he told Metro.co.uk: ‘They sometimes would tell me it was Christmas but it was never much of a celebration as I was by myself.

‘I remember one Christmas I got a boiled egg and a cold tomato for lunch.

‘I thought to myself “oh well, there are people who don’t even get that.”

‘So Christmas in captivity was really like any other day of the year but it was pretty cold.’

Terry, an envoy of the Archbishop of Canterbury, travelled to Lebanon in 1987 to try to secure the release of British hostage John McCarthy and other Western captives.

But he was accused of being a CIA agent and kidnapped himself, bundled into the back of a car and driven across Beirut before he was ordered to jump through a trap door.

He found himself in a tiled room and his ordeal saw him endure mental and physical torture and a mock execution.

Being 6ft 7in tall, Terry struggled to stand in the cell and he recalled there was no room to walk.

He was chained for 23 hours and 50 minutes of the day, save for one bathroom break.

He said: ‘For the first three-and-a-half years, I was without papers or books.

‘I went four-and-half years without speaking to anyone else. There was no companionship, no natural light and I slept on the floor with nothing.

‘I refused food for the first week because I was so angry. I was angry at being treated in this way but also my refusal showed I still had a measure of control over my situation.

‘It was saying “you can capture my body but you can’t capture me completely.”’

During his hostage years, Terry said he worked to channel his anger away from being a destructive force because ‘it would have harmed me more than those who took me.’

There was no mental or physical stimulation but he fought to keep his mind active and wrote his first book, Taken on Trust, in his head.

He added: ‘I used to try and ask for books and they wouldn’t bring me any.

‘Not for about three-and-half years until one day a kindly guard said “I’ll try and get you a book.”

‘He didn’t know what to get because he didn’t read English.

‘Whenever anyone came into the cell I had to be blindfolded but one day he came in and dropped a book.

‘There aren’t many funny things about life in captivity but I laughed out loud when I saw this book.

‘Unknown to him, he had bought me “The Great Escape.”

‘It then went from bad to worse because the next book was a manual of breastfeeding and the one after was on childcare.

‘I then asked for a pencil and paper and drew a picture of a penguin.

‘I said to him “if you see that symbol on the front of a book, it will be a good book.”’

Terry said the only time he came close to giving up was when he contracted a bronchial infection, which left him unable to lie down to sleep.

He was nearing the end of his ordeal and had been moved to a shared cell with American hostage Terry Anderson and fellow British captive John McCarthy.

He said a simple hand touch from the men gave him the power to survive and he was eventually freed on November 18, 1991.

Terry has returned several times to the Middle East and says he forgives his captors, adding the people of Lebanon have ‘suffered far more than I have.’

He added: ‘I can forgive. Very much so.

‘I don’t agree with hostage taking but I can understand why they did it.

‘Many of those young lads who were in charge of us had been brought up in a situation of warfare.

‘They were at the bottom of the pile economically and socially and were manipulated by charismatic leaders.

‘I wouldn’t want to go through the experience again but it was full of learning and I can’t regret it.’

He added: ‘I learnt I had to keep hope alive. And that the secret really is to live for now. Not to think too far ahead, not to dwell too much on the difficulties of the past but to live for now.’

Immediately after his release, Terry went to study at Cambridge which he says helped him steadily acclimatise to life back in the UK.

He also threw himself into charity work and, in honour of his father who find himself homeless during the 1920s depression, he helps with the charity Emmaus.

Realising there was little support for life after captivity, he also co-founded Hostage International, which give support to hostage families and returning hostages.

The father-of-four added: ‘Christmas can be a time of real difficulty for families who have had someone taken hostage and they have no knowledge of how they are.

‘We do all we can to support them.

‘I have now passed my 80th birthday and I sometimes wonder how many more Christmas days I will spend being able to support hostage families or those who are homeless.

‘I know what it’s like and it’s not easy.

‘I would like to wish anyone reading this article a happy and peaceful Christmas.’

Lebanon hostage crisis

Terry Waite was one of 104 foreign hostages kidnapped in Lebanon between 1982 and 1992 when the Lebanese Civil War was at its height.

The hostages were mainly Americans and Western Europeans, including 12 Brits, and they were taken by various clans within the Iranian-backed Hezbollah organisation.

At least eight hostages died in captivity, some were murdered while others died from a lack of adequate medical attention.

In 1983, Hezbollah took responsibility for two bomb attacks in Beirut that killed 241 Americans and 58 Frenchmen.

The hostage taking is believed to have been a plan to discourage the West from taking action against the militant group.

Terry Waite had gone to Beirut as a special envoy to attempt to negotiate the release of Western hostages when he was taken.

The end of the crisis was precipitated by the need for Western aid for Syria and Iran following the end of the Iran-Iraq war and the collapse of the Soviet Union.

In the 1990s, Hezbollah transformed from a revolutionary group into a political one and occupies seats in the Lebanese parliament.

The Shia Muslim group still has a military wing – outlawed by many Western powers – that is said to be more powerful that the Lebanese military and receives money and training from Iran.

In 2006, Hezbollah fought a 34-day border war with Israel that left more than 1,200 people dead.

An uneasy truce was maintained for around a decade but minor skirmishes between the groups have begun again in recent months.

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