Last night, as Theresa May sent word that she’s secured more Brexit concessions from Strasbourg, the UK’s anti-EU party had an announcement to make.

UKIP has polled at almost 10% for much of the decade and won the 2014 European Elections. Their core purpose – their very reason to exist – is to ensure Britain leaves the EU.

This was a big moment for them. Perhaps the party’s biggest moment since their referendum night victory.

The tweet read: “PATRIOTS SUBSCRIBE TO PEWDIEPIE”

Those of you who are familiar with science fiction will be aware of alternate realities and parallel universes.

They’re plot devices often invoked in order to liven up a franchise which is under threat of going stale.

The characters you know and love are all present, but there’s a twist. Up is down, left is right. Some detail is different, with entertaining results.

In Star Trek, you have the Mirror Universe, where Spock has a goatee and people eat Kelpians for lunch.

Marvel Comics has dozens of parallel worlds. In some of them, Spider-Man is a cartoon pig.

Perhaps most famous is Back to the Future Part II, in which a tiny change to history makes Biff Tannen a billionaire and turns Hill Valley into Vegas on crack.

Most people assume we live in the "prime timeline" – the one where everything is normal and as it should be.

I have long suspected we are living in an alternate timeline.

This is the Banter Timeline – where all the things that were supposed to happen don’t, and are replaced by the most objectively hilarious alternative.

It was created when a bored London student in the mid-2000s said to a friend: “Wouldn’t it be funny if that posh blonde bloke off of Have I Got News For You was mayor of London?”

And the universe said “Yes. Yes it would.”

“Tell you what, it’d be a laugh if Brexit won, wouldn’t it?”

“Yeah, and how about if Donald Trump had a hit TV show?”

“The guy from Home Alone 2? Dream big, my dude. Let’s make him President of the United States.”

“Amazing. Now, who’s the most entertaining person we can get to be leader of the Labour Party?”

It’s certainly endearing that there are still people out there who believe Brexit is all going to be resolved with some kind of sensible deal, which sees Britain set sail as a buccaneering independent coastal nation.

But we’re in the Banter Timeline.

In the Banter Timeline, only the most darkly hilarious outcome is possible.

Let’s face it, we’ve already had the Attorney General yelling "BOLLOCKS" at prominent TV news anchors this morning, so I don’t know why you’d expect anything more sensible from the rest of the day.

Of all the plausible outcomes of this evening’s vote, Theresa May’s deal getting another embarrassing drubbing from MPs certainly has the most comedic potential.

Beyond that, only the god of banter knows what delights are in store.

Perhaps MPs will plump for no-deal in their vote tomorrow, plunging us into a Mad Max-style apocalypse, where all there is to eat is freeze dried fish from bags.

Or maybe the most banterrific outcome is for MPs to block no-deal AND block an extension to Article 50 in upcoming votes, leaving us in some weird limbo state.

Maybe the Queen will get involved. Maybe Jacob Rees-Mogg will be Prime Minister come June, and will have passed a law demanding a butler on every street corner by Christmas.

But whatever the next step, we should probably give up on the idea of this all being sorted out in a calm, sensible fashion.

Sorry everyone, that’s a different timeline.

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