SINGAPORE – Mother’s Day this year held special meaning for first-time mother Tam Xiang Ying as she celebrated the occasion on Sunday (May 10) with her own mother and baby daughter by her side.

For two months, the 32-year-old was in a dilemma: Give up a job she enjoys at the People’s Association or stay home to care for her first-born.

Then in July last year, her mother stepped in and ended her struggle. Madam Lim Bee Wah, 56, quit her job of 14 years at a logistics firm to help bring up Faye, her first grandchild, who turned one last Friday.

“I loved my job. But I love my family more,” Madam Lim told The Straits Times in Mandarin over the weekend.

Ms Tam added that the meal with her mother was not only a rare treat but an occasion for her to reflect on her mother’s sacrifice.

“It reminded me that I must always make time for family because work can wait, family can’t.”

Her struggle to strike a balance between being a mum and holding down a full-time job came to a head in July last year, two months after Faye was born.

As deputy constituency director at Bukit Timah Community Club, where she has been serving residents for seven years, she tends to work long hours and on weekends too. Her husband, an events photographer, works unpredictable hours as well and often on weekends.

So, a childcare centre for her daughter was not an option. Also, as a new mother, she was hesitant about leaving her child alone with a domestic helper or a relative.

“I kept asking myself whether I should just stay home for a year,” she said.

Witnessing her dilemma, Madam Lim took the unexpected decision and resigned, which shocked her boss and her colleagues.

She said: “I wanted my daughter to be able to focus while at work and not worry about her baby at home.

“She has a good job that she likes and should concentrate on advancing her career while young. It will be better for her future.

Added Madam Lim with a laugh: “I’m glad I’m not too old, and can still help. In fact, I now feel younger as Faye brings back memories of my joyful times with my daughter when she was a child.”

Ms Tam said she is especially grateful for her mother’s help in the current Covid-19 pandemic.

Her daily work, which exposes her to many residents, has added risks. Also, she sometimes works till midnight because of additional duties such as distributing face masks and hand sanitisers and explaining the circuit breaker measures to residents.

“When I head out, Faye is not awake, and when I return, she is already asleep. It’s sad, but I’ve learnt to cope with it.

“More importantly, I’ve peace of mind knowing she is in the hands of someone I trust.”

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