Thursday, 2 May 2024

Sinead Ryan: 'How Delaney birthday do took the cake'

I’ve a birthday not too far away. Normally I’d go for a quiet dinner with family and friends, minimal on the gifts and no big hullaballoo.

I’ve been doing it all wrong. Inspired of late, I’m going all out.

Five-star hotel, a sit-down dinner with all the trimmings, custom-made cake, all the booze and, sure, if anyone wants to stay over, I’ll organise a top suite for them. I’ll ask everyone I know, and I reckon I can get the whole lot for under €70,000… just.

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Now, obviously I don’t have that kind of cash lying around, but needs must. Who wouldn’t want to be there?

So I’m going to ask my boss to pay for it. Sure, why wouldn’t he? Celebrating a special birthday is bound to come under the ‘necessary expenditure’ column on the annual accounts. Can’t imagine anyone having an issue with it. We all do it, right?

Oh, my inspiration? John Delaney, obviously. Grand important gent that he is, the FAI saw no problem in digging deep – deeper than its bank account allowed, as it happens – to fork out for his special day.

And who wasn’t moved to tears at the sight of his enormous birthday cake in the shape of the Aviva Stadium, complete with iced, working, floodlights, or the super-sized cardboard cut out of the birthday boy himself looming over guests on arrival.

Turning 50 is a personal achievement for most of us, but for our John it was worthy of a corporate event.

He has subsequently repaid some of the largesse, but one wonders how the bean counters in the FAI squared that big circle on the balance sheet.

Inspiring, John. Inspiring.

 

Home comforts can console poor Seánie

Glad to see the mortgage market is perking up. Long-suffering buyers, strangled by banks unwilling to loosen their grip on lending so that beleaguered, careworn borrowers, unable to put food on the table, or, er, pay a court fine should one be savagely imposed on them, will no doubt be buoyed by the example of that exemplary figure in Irish life, Seán FitzPatrick.

Not one to be bowed by mere bankruptcy, crusading pensioner Seánie is finding things “extremely difficult” financially, according to his solicitor.

He would be “at the pin of his collar” if he had to fork out the €25,000 fine from Chartered Accountants Ireland, which took a mere 12 years to reveal he probably wasn’t fit to be a member of their august body any more, given the debts of €147m he racked up with no prospect of repayment.

The poverty-stricken pensioner, scrambling for change behind the sofa to cobble together the nasty fine, is keeping busy in retirement by building a €500,000 home in the leafy vale of Greystones. Four bedrooms over 238sqm of the lavish property on its own land will no doubt be meagre solace as he scrapes together pennies to put in the leccy meter.

 

James Galway is still note perfect at 80

Stressed out by the busyness of Christmas, I find myself more often tuning into Lyric FM when I get into the car. Brexit, elections, politics and news can all wait the half-hour journey home.

By chance, I tuned into a concert given for James Galway, who has just turned 80. The man with the golden flute played too, and there wasn’t a quiver of uncertainty, not a scintilla of hesitation nor a wavering of note.

Just a complete assuredness of touch, a stunning ease of flow – truly a master at work.

Happy birthday Sir James, and many more.

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